Communication can be hard. I know that it is the most basic of human skills, but that doesn’t make it easy. After watching Celeste Headlee’s TED talk, I decided I would try to make a conscious effort to have better conversations and communication. Although I am sometimes good at having conversations, I’m not always. So the other day, I stopped by my job on campus (at Campus Ministry) and I attempted to talk using her tips. One of the people working was a co-worker that I am friends with but not particularly close friends. I began having a conversation with her.
One of the first things I tried to ask was how are you. This is a question everyone asks in day-to-day life but rarely actually talks about. Even casual responses about the horribleness of Finals week can give insight into how the other person is. For the first part of our conversation, I listened intently and gave her my entire focus. Yet, as the conversation went on, I found myself having trouble following the advice from the ted talk. I felt my mind wander and distract myself from listening. We have become so attached to our phones and to another world that we sometimes don’t value our conversations.
Writing about this conversation harkens me back to something that was on my philosophy test today. Some philosopher (I forgot who as soon as I finished the test, wrote a book discussing the difference between I-You and I-It relationships. In an I-you relationship, you try to understand where the other person is coming from. You relate and empathize with them on a personal basis. It is an inherent connection between two people. I was able to maintain an I-you relationship for part of my conversation with my co-worker but not for the entire conversation. I kept feeling my mind being drawn out into unimproved unconnected thoughts. Our society’s current obsession with corporal things rather than relationships is an issue and I will keep working on my ability to have actual conversations and communication.
————————————————————————————-Music Corner
In my opinion, this was the best top 40 song of the past decade and it has the word “talk” in the name so it fits this blog post.
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